“Show, don’t tell” is one of those writing aphorisms every fiction writer has heard. Short, catchy—and often misunderstood. This guide explains what it really means, why it matters, how to do it, when not to, and gives hands-on examples and exercises so you can put it into practice.
Estimated reading time: 6 minutes
What “Show, Don’t Tell” Actually Means
Telling hands the reader a conclusion: it states what a character feels, what a place is like, or what’s happening. Showing delivers sensory detail, action, dialogue, and subtext so the reader experiences the scene and infers meaning.
- Telling: Maria was scared.
- Showing: Maria’s hands wouldn’t stop shaking; she kept scanning the doorway as if it might open at any second.
Showing invites readers into the moment and lets them draw their own conclusions, which builds emotional investment and immersion.
Why It Matters
- Immersion: Concrete sensory detail pulls readers into the moment.
- Characterization: Choices and actions reveal character more powerfully than labels.
- Subtext and tension: Showing allows for nuance—emotions can sit under the surface.
- Pacing and focus: Scenes that show slow the reader for important moments; telling speeds transitions.
A simple rule: show when the moment matters; tell when it doesn’t.
Core Techniques for Showing
- Use concrete sensory detail
- Telling: The bakery smelled good.
- Showing: Warm sugar and butter hit her on the first step; a cinnamon ribbon curled in the steam.
- Reveal emotion through behavior and physical reaction
- Telling: He was nervous.
- Showing: He rubbed the back of his neck and kept glancing at his phone.
- Prefer specific nouns and active verbs
- Telling: The room was nice.
- Showing: A brass lamp threw a honeyed cone of light across the threadbare sofa.
- Let dialogue carry subtext
- Telling: They were uncomfortable around each other.
- Showing: “So—how’s your mother?” she asked, stirring her tea without looking up.
- Use one telling detail rather than a list
- Telling: He was poor.
- Showing: His shoes’ soles had been sewn back on more times than he could count.
- Show through choices and actions
- Telling: He was selfish.
- Showing: He took the last slice and didn’t offer it to anyone.
- Use the setting to mirror or contrast mood
- Telling: The town was depressing.
- Showing: Storefronts stared past cracked windows; a single lamppost flickered like a tired eye.
Before and After (Short Examples)
- Telling: Anna was furious. She slammed the book down and yelled at Tom.Showing: Anna slammed the book so hard it skimmed across the table. Her breath came in short bursts. “You always do this, Tom. You never think—” The words toppled over each other and broke.
- Telling: The old house was creepy and made Jason nervous.Showing: The floorboards called with each step, and a musty sweetness hung in the hallway like old silk. Jason paused at the stairwell and listened for anything that might answer him.
Examples from Contemporary Authors (paraphrase + tiny practice lines)
Below are six living writers known for strong “showing” techniques: a short note about how they show, a paraphrase of a moment from their work (no long quotes), and a tiny original example you can practice.
1) Sally Rooney — Showing through clipped dialogue and the spaces between lines
- How she shows: Rooney uses natural, often mundane dialogue and the silences or evasions around it to reveal power dynamics and emotion rather than stating feelings.
- Paraphrase of a moment: Two former lovers sit across from each other; they talk about routines and mutual acquaintances while the real tension — who left, who hurt whom — hangs unsaid in the small corrections and brief answers.
- Practice line (original): “Do you want the tea?” she said. He stared at the cup an extra beat before answering, “No,” and the word didn’t close anything.
Takeaway: Study conversations where the subject never names the real problem; notice what people avoid.
2) Celeste Ng — Showing family emotion through small domestic details
- How she shows: Ng often signals deep family tensions through ordinary household moments — where objects are placed, what people eat, who cleans what.
- Paraphrase of a moment: A mother rearranges school photos on the mantel every morning, careful to hide one face behind a ceramic vase, and the quiet ritual speaks more about shame and protection than any explanation.
- Practice line (original): She stacked the cereal boxes so the brand with his face on the back wouldn’t face the doorway; the routine took two seconds but smoothed the morning like an apology.
Takeaway: Look for domestic rituals you can use as emotional shorthand.
3) Colson Whitehead — Showing with precise, sensory immediacy and striking concrete images
- How he shows: Whitehead uses crisp, often surprising images and tactile detail to make setting and mood immediate; a small physical detail can carry thematic weight.
- Paraphrase of a moment: A character walks past a row of closed storefronts; the grease-splattered windows and a hand-lettered sign tell you more about decline and stubborn survival than a paragraph of exposition would.
- Practice line (original): The deli’s neon sputtered like a bad confession; a single plastic chair sat by the door, its vinyl scarred where a thousand elbows had leaned for hope.
Takeaway: Pick one strong, slightly unexpected sensory detail and let it do the work.
4) Zadie Smith — Showing social and interior life through energetic detail and contrasts
- How she shows: Smith often juxtaposes wide social observation with intimate, comic details that reveal character; she uses rhythm and lists to animate scenes.
- Paraphrase of a moment: At a family party, the narrator catalogs small absurdities — an uncle’s terrible jokes, the precise way the aunt twirls her fork — and those details reveal changing alliances and embarrassment.
- Practice line (original): He laughed too loud at his cousin’s joke, the sound bouncing off chandeliers and landing like a coin in the silence between them.
Takeaway: Use a quick, energetic list or contrast to show complex social dynamics.
5) Jesmyn Ward — Showing emotional truth through landscape and bodily detail
- How she shows: Ward ties emotional states to weather, landscape, and the body; physical hardship and environment are inseparable from feeling.
- Paraphrase of a moment: A mother returns from the floodplain covered in gray mud; her steady, exhausted movements tell the reader everything about loss and resilience.
- Practice line (original): Her arms smelled of river—wet earth and old rope—and she cradled the small carton like a secret she’d promised to keep.
Takeaway: Let the natural world or body carry symbolic and emotional weight without naming it.
6) Ocean Vuong — Showing with lyricism and fragmentary sensory images
- How he shows: Vuong uses poetic, fragmentary images and surprising metaphors to make interior life visible; small physical sensations often unlock larger emotional truths.
- Paraphrase of a moment: A narrator remembers a childhood kitchen through a single repeated sensation — the sound of a spoon on ceramic — and that repeated detail opens an entire history of longing.
- Practice line (original): The light in the doorway bent around him like a question; when he reached out his hand, the wood answered with that same hollow thunk it had made when he was ten.
Takeaway: Use a recurring sensory motif or small image as an emotional key.
How to use this section: Inserted here to follow the short before/after examples, each entry is short and practice-focused so readers can read an author tip, a paraphrase to orient them, and an immediate original line to imitate.
When Telling Is the Right Choice
Showing is powerful but not always appropriate. Use telling when you need to:
- Summarize time quickly (transitions, brief backstory)
- Keep the story moving past minor details
- Maintain a consistent first-person voice that tends to generalize
- Avoid bogging down pacing when the emotional weight doesn’t warrant full dramatization
Rule of thumb: show the scenes that matter; tell the connective tissue.
Common Pitfalls and Fixes
- Overloading on description: Pick a few sensory specifics, not a catalog.
- Mistaking internal commentary for showing: Internal summary can still be telling—replace it with action or a small physical detail.
- Relying on adverbs: Swap “said angrily” for a clipped reply, a slammed door, or a cold silence.
- Leaning on clichés: Fresh, precise detail beats vague figurative language.
Quick revision checklist:
- Am I telling a feeling instead of depicting it?
- Could action or dialogue reveal this better than narration?
- Is there one vivid sensory detail I can add?
- Is this moment worth showing, or should I summarize?
Exercises to Practice Showing
- Rewrite 10 feelings: Turn sentences like “She was tired,” “He was proud,” into single showing sentences.
- Dialogue-only scene: Write one page of scene with only dialogue and gestures—no tags like “she said angrily.” Let subtext do the work.
- Short scene rewrite: Take an expository paragraph from your draft and dramatize it into two paragraphs of action/dialogue.
- Sensory inventory: Pick a location and list five concrete sensory details; write a 250-word scene using them.
Leave a Reply